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2/27/18 11:34 pm

There is a certain turmoil when running.

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2/16/18 08:56 am

I want you or I want to move on with my life.

2/11/18 11:18 pm

All of my friends think that i'm blessed

They don't know my head is a mess

No, they don't know who i really am

They don't know what i've been through

1/25/18 04:46 pm

I’m not saying you’ll be together.
And if it doesn’t work out you’ll miss her so much you’ll barely be able to move.
You’ll feel you have no purpose, no reason to go on.
But there’s nothing to do but wait, wait and it’ll get clear to you.
You’ll get on with your life and gifts will come into it.

1/23/18 01:44 am

I had never felt such rage. It was pure fire born from heartache and anguish. I felt embarrassed and used. Rage that threatened to transform into blind recklessness; to go out there and drive, crash and burn. It was radiated so fiercely from within, uncontrollable and demonic. But I had a life I wanted to live, people I had yet to meet and places to lay eyes on. So I tried to let it go. It would take awhile but I would quell the flame and return to being ice cold. It never did any good to wear my heart on my sleeve.

12/3/17 09:11 pm

My heart is pierced by Cupid, I disdain all glittering gold,
There is nothing that can console me but my jolly sailor bold.

Come all you pretty fair maids, whoever you may be
Who love a jolly sailor bold that ploughs the raging sea.

9/1/17 10:45 pm - Sunday, 27th August 2017 @ 1938 hrs

His vision had begun to deteriorate long before he sat in the briefing room of the medical centre, penning his thoughts in a black notebook with a picture of himself with his grandmother on the first page. Use of his swollen and reddened eyes had been put on hold an hour earlier as he lay on the crumpled blue sheets that limply wrapped the lone mattress in the middle of the room surrounded by a fortress of ugly orange chairs, dreaming about classrooms and imaginary people named Elaine Foo and a panel giving him ratings based on his looks and personality.

These dreams were a strange relief to the sorrow and uneasiness he felt every waking minute since his eyes had been infected with the sores. The veins bulged and stretched his eyes, making them seem to pop out of their sockets, causing him much discomfort. The slimy discharge could be seen long after he had wiped them from his eyes using his sleeves, a whitish residue resembling mucus. His eyelids weld shut each time he slept and required flexing when he woke, a distinct cracking sound when he forced them open with his fingers. It was an unpleasant feeling he certainly did not welcome.

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7/25/17 10:33 pm

When you get those rare moments of clarity, those flashes when the universe makes sense, you try desperately to hold on to them. They are the life boats for the darker times, when the vastness of it all, the incomprehensible nature of life is completely elusive. So the question becomes, or should have been all along; what would you do if you knew you only had one day or one week or one month to live?

What life boat would you grab on to?
What secret would you tell?
What band would you see?
What person would you declare your love to?
What wish would you fulfill?
What exotic locale would you fly to for coffee?
What book would you write?

7/22/17 12:19 pm

Snaking my way through the shops at Geylang East Central reminds me of the period when I spent most of my nights doing exactly the same at Serangoon Central. The old shops sold cheap goods, pirated gaming cards and once shiny watches through old and yellowed viewing panels.

It makes me sad to think much of Serangoon Central has changed drastically in the past 5 years. I wonder if the same shop owners still parade their wares there or whether spanking new owners have replaced them.

We can never prevent change. We can hardly even cling on to the sentimentality these memories make us feel. The phrase "love always wins" doesn't quite ring true either. People grow old and die. New managements make changes. Memories are relegated to the very back of minds. Nothing stays the same.

6/13/17 11:32 pm

You're on a boat with a hole in its side. You can't get off the boat or buy a new one. What you can do is bail the water out faster than it's coming in.
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